Growing love
I wonder to myself quite often how people make the decision to marry so difficult and yet the decision to walk away and divorce is so easy. I remember the day my husband and I first started dating. I remember our first date, the first time he said “I love you” , and I will always remember the day he asked me to make his life complete and be his wife. I of course said yes without hesitation. I never doubted my committment to him for a minute. I have never questioned whether or not he was the other part of my soul. I set out in my marriage with an understanding of what was expected of me and I of him. Being a child of a divorced couple I knew first hand what that entailed from the childs perspective. I made a promise to myself to never settle for less than I deserved; not to say that I am so great that I was not to suffer any heartaches, but that I knew what I wanted in a partner and would not make exceptions. I find it so hard to believe that when you truly love someone that it really ever goes away. I told my soon to be husband at the time that if he had any doubt about the fact that he would be looking at me in sixty years on the front porch in a rocking chair to back off now and not make the committment to marry me, because what I wanted I wanted for my life not for a little while just for the fun of it all.
I look around today and see that more and more people give up and walk away without ever looking back. No thoughts on how this will affect them for the rest of their lives. I do understand that there are some things people just cannot overcome in marriage and it ends in divorce no matter how hard the fight. I do not however, understand those that run away when things get rough. My husband and I have had some very difficult times in our marriage; some of them are things I have seen others not be able to escape. Everyday I thank God for the blessings he has provided in my life and my husband is at the top of that list. Do not get me wrong he gets on my nerves, aggravates me, and just to be honest he has made me more angry than any other person has ever been able to; but you know what at the end of the day I love him, that part never changes. We do not go to bed mad, we talk about everything. He knows when I am hurt, angry, happy, sad, or worried before I even open my mouth. He can finish my sentences and I can his as well. We are one being he and I and I would never trade one minute of what we have today with anyone I know or know of, not even the bad times. All the good times and bad have made us what we are today.
I remember hearing from someone “I will give them six months”. That sounds so funny to me now. We will soon be celebrating 14 years of marriage. I would say that in todays world marrying at the ripe old age of twenty most last about six months. I am proud to say that we overcame all the odds and we are stronger now than we were when we first married. I also know that as much as I loved him the first year I never imagined I could love him more; however I was wrong it grows bigger, and deeper everyday I am blessed to be his wife and mother of his children. I think that when you decide to marry someone you should just know without hesitation whether or not he or she is the other matching part of your soul. Those that you can literally feel even when they are thousands of miles away are part of your soul.
Do we argue? Of course. Do we disagree? Of course. Are we stubborn? Of course. Does it matter? No. We just know……….and that is all that matters.
Comments
2 Comments on Growing love
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Kathy on
Sat, 10th May 2008 8:03 pm
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Bonnie Hayes on
Mon, 26th May 2008 11:35 am
Beautiful post. One key to making a marriage work is like you said…knowing what you want and not settling for less. Too many people go into a relationship or marriage for the wrong reasons and never think about criteria that would make a good partner for a lifetime. Some focus on money, some on looks and THEN they get to know each other lol and sometimes they don’t like what they have gotten themselves into.
I wish you many more years of happiness.
I think this was a beautiful comment to commitment. I think there is a commitment allergy in our community, we LOVE it seems to move to the negative. “I give them 6 months!” I wonder what the purpose in some comment like that is? Why bother to even say that outloud? If they fail - they fail it’s certainly no cause for celebration. Life is so short and I for one am glad this lady is celebrating it to the fulliest.
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